Asilomar State Beach, Pacific Groove, California
There is an ecstatic mechanism in birds that makes them fly upwards in spite of worms. ~ Lawrence Ferlinghetti
I’m waiting for the full moon to rise. A haze of clouds is streaking through the sky this evening, so I may be wasting my time. The sun is setting behind me as I make final adjustments to my camera. The sea breeze is crisp and clean, and the bay sparkles in the golden light. I fear the clouds will mask the horizon until the moon rises too high to catch it glinting across the bay and filtering through the masts and sails. I’m ambivalent, though. The photo doesn’t matter.
The climate change news and the pervasive political drama obscures my mind. The facets of the dilemma are always casting shadows. As a teen during the Cold War, the knowledge of nuclear warheads pointed at our collective forehead filled me with intense anxiety. I was jealous of past generations who didn’t have to worry about planetary destruction, but of course, they had their own existential troubles. The moon should appear right now, but I don’t see it.
Even if the moon did break through the clouds, I may not be able to photograph it properly, so it’s all just a fool’s errand, or at least it seems so. I can hear the seagulls laughing and the sea lions barking, mixing with the sound of traffic. Dwelling on anxious abstractions doesn’t change a thing. They’re just thoughts in my head while I wait for the moon to appear through a cloudy sky.